Shipping and delivery

We include shipping in the price. No surprises. What you see is what you pay. We did the algebra so you can keep your calculator holstered. Plus no sales taxes, for now.

Check the description of the item you’re buying for *USA shipping* or *UK shipping*. Choose the right one. Otherwise, your order will be flushed down the toilet. Triple check before you order, please. Don’t be a silly sausage.

Where we ship

USA and UK. If you live somewhere else and are willing to pay a little more (and wait a little longer) then contact us.

How long it takes

Your order is made to order. Two steps. Very dramatic.

1) Production
1–4 business days. Printers hum. Ink does jazz hands. Hamsters sign tiny NDAs.

2) Shipping

• USA: 2–6 business days → Total: 3–10 business days

• UK: 2–6 business days → Total: 3–10 business days

  Peak season? Add 3–5 business days. We don’t control snow or elves. We asked. They ignored us.
  Summary- You might get your order in 3 days, if you’re lucky. It might be 2 weeks if you’re not. Either way you’ll get it.

Tracking

We email tracking when available. Some items ship in multiple packages. Think of them as parcels doing a long-distance relationship. They reunite.

Address changes

Spot a typo? Tell us within 12 hours. After printing starts, your parcel enters cheetah mode and ignores our waving.

Lost or late?

• USA: If tracking doesn’t move for 10 business days, we reprint/reship.

• UK: 20 business days, then we reprint/reship.
  We don’t argue with dimensional portals. They always win.

Damaged or wrong item

Email photos within 30 days of delivery. We replace. No drama. We press the Big Reprint Button and nod solemnly.

PO boxes & special addresses

Some items can’t go to PO/APO/FPO addresses. If that happens, we’ll shout (politely) and sort it (calmly).

Summary: Free shipping. Clear timelines. Made-to-order quality. We’ll fix major issues. Now go buy a dumb shirt.