*USA shipping* unisex Christmas sweater - For Christmas day arguments, gift for family and friends, festive dress

$47.00

For moments when your soul whispers “nope” but your manners say “thank you.” This cozy crewneck is the perfect outfit for receiving unwanted gifts and unsolicited family advice. The letters pop like a diplomatic incident in Helvetica.

Why it’s the definitive awkward-occasion uniform

  • Dropped shoulders so you can shrug with architectural integrity

  • Ribbed cuffs/hem that hug tighter than a forced smile around the Christmas tree 

  • Seamless body—smooth as the way you change the subject

  • Plush 80/20 fleece: soft enough to buffer disappointment, durable enough to survive group chats

  • Medium-heavy weight for year-round “I appreciate the effort, though” energy

Care (emotional and textile)

  • Machine wash cold (30°C/90°F) to preserve the sarcastic glow

  • Tumble dry low—high heat intensifies opinions

  • Low iron if needed; do not iron your feelings

  • Non-chlorine bleach only; regular bleach erases the lore

  • No dry cleaning—this sweatshirt thrives on fresh air and boundaries

Use cases: Office “fun” days, festive blind dates with unsettling hobbies, and every gift you didn’t ask for but will discuss in the group chat

For moments when your soul whispers “nope” but your manners say “thank you.” This cozy crewneck is the perfect outfit for receiving unwanted gifts and unsolicited family advice. The letters pop like a diplomatic incident in Helvetica.

Why it’s the definitive awkward-occasion uniform

  • Dropped shoulders so you can shrug with architectural integrity

  • Ribbed cuffs/hem that hug tighter than a forced smile around the Christmas tree 

  • Seamless body—smooth as the way you change the subject

  • Plush 80/20 fleece: soft enough to buffer disappointment, durable enough to survive group chats

  • Medium-heavy weight for year-round “I appreciate the effort, though” energy

Care (emotional and textile)

  • Machine wash cold (30°C/90°F) to preserve the sarcastic glow

  • Tumble dry low—high heat intensifies opinions

  • Low iron if needed; do not iron your feelings

  • Non-chlorine bleach only; regular bleach erases the lore

  • No dry cleaning—this sweatshirt thrives on fresh air and boundaries

Use cases: Office “fun” days, festive blind dates with unsettling hobbies, and every gift you didn’t ask for but will discuss in the group chat

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